What’s it gonna be?
Dec 17th, 2004 by Ashley
My life seems stuck recently. Last night in bed, the thought that I don't really belong here came across
my mind. I mean the job. It's not the first time I tried to figure out whether this job is for me or not, but
I can't think straight. Afterall, I don't know myself that well. However, last night it became so clear all
of the sudden. I don't enjoy it at all.
What will I enjoy? Let's forget about hanging around doing nothing, watching TV, listening to music, or
reading novels for now. Am I looking for something more challengin? Isn't this job challenging? (FYI, this
is not a retorted answer.) Yes, I still don't know what I want, but I guess I have a somewhat not-too-
vague idea of what I don't want. But then again, it doesn't matter much whether I enjoy this job or not.
It's only a process, an oppertunity for me to practice seriousness. I kept telling myself, don't be a so-
called nowadays-irresponsible-young-adults, but boy, there's a reason for there being so many “nowadays-
irresponsible-young-adults” enough for people to conclude that yound adults nowadays tend to be…
irresponsible.
Apparently there's a huge gap between knowing what to do and doing what to do. What a cliche.
Well, I guess I wanna do something that's more…affective(?). Not necessarily something that will change
others life, but something that's mind-related(?).
Afterall, I do hate programming.