You hold yourself so hard that it nearly breaks you. And yes you’re still afraid. You’re a chickenshit alright. And then you suddenly and slightly realized how much courage it took and how precious it was and is. You know you’re torturing him and what you didn’t notice is that you’re giving away something uncommon. You know the risks that you wouldn’t take. You know your imagination is the only place that the fantasies stay. But so many are punching you in the heart. Alluring you, whispering in your ears and your heart just can’t help but reaching ecstasy and fall. The fall will crash your bones along with your soul. You know it’s that powerful, why cant you just get up and leave. You know you’re one feet out of the skyscraper. Step inside while you still have one on the floor.